Missing: Where are the Men in Kilts?

Just who I need to tell about the missing men-in-kilts in Scotland? Does one call the police about something as horrible as an entire group of people who went missing during my recent trip to Scotland? Scotland Yard, perhaps? (sorry – couldn’t help myself there!)

I had the wonderful and exhausting opportunity to travel to England and Scotland over the Easter holidays with a group of students and faculty (and a couple of parents) from my youngest son and my oldest son and daughter-in-law’s high school. The original plan was for me to go with them and do things on my own, since I had things to do on my own....a list of them leftover from my trip four years ago. But, plans changed and I ended up with them for seven days, in London for five more and then north to Scotland . . . in search of the elusive man-in-a-kilt. Like this one >>>>

Now, I’d seen them before – on my last trip to Scotland in 2004, there were bunches. On my first trip to Scotland in 2002, they were everywhere and even included American men in a wedding there. What could have happened to them? I decided a thorough search was necessary before reaching any conclusions that might panic the women of the world. So, I visited lots of places in Scotland:

Edinburgh – a tip to toe search of Edinburgh Castle and Holyrood House and everywhere in between on the Royal Mile was fruitless.

Robert and William are wearing something medieval – but not kilts!

I looked up and down the alleys, closes and wynds.....no kilts there either!

Found this. . . . What the heck is this?

Are the real Scottish Hairy-coos missing, too?

I decided to widen my search and left Edinburgh for Stirling Castle, Dunfermline Abbey, the fields of Bannockburn , and finally Rosslyn Chapel and Castle....Found what looks like a palm tree here at Stirling Castle . . .

I even searched high up on the scaffolding that surrounds Rosslyn Chapel – found some old cup that’s supposed to be the answer to some historical mysteries, but alas, no men in kilts!

It wasn’t until my last day when I took a bus trip out to the Highlands that I think I discovered the reason for their absence. . . The weather which had been kind of wet the whole I’d been there turned to something worse – as we left Edinburgh and traveled north and then west,

these were some of the sights....

Hey wait! That's SNOW!

I suddenly realized that, most likely, the cause of this lack of men in kilts

could be weather-related! I mean, we all know what a Scottish man wears under his kilt, right? Or doesn’t? Confused and concerned, I sought the advice of my tourguide –

-- a wonderfully-knowledgeable man named Ali (short for Alistair) who was so experienced in Highland lore and tradition that he managed to teach a bunch of outlanders a Scottish country dance in a parking lot near Fort William. And he had the answer. He looked up at the snow falling around us and said the one word that explained it all. . . .

Shrinkage!!

So, my next trip will definitely be during the warmer months. Wanna come with me?

Terri Brisbin invites you all to visit her newly-designed website ( www.terribrisbin.com ) to find out more about her books and her unfailing fascination with Scottish men, kilts optional!