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Thursday, March 28, 2019

My “Say Yes” Experiment




One of the most vital characteristics of a writer is being disciplined. Disciplined enough to sit down in a chair every day to work, even when the Muse is nowhere to be found. Disciplined enough to say “no” to fun opportunities until the writing is done. I’ve always excelled at this. I’ve got a great grasp of my boundaries and I’ll draw them as often as necessary to get my book finished. It’s a good skill to have for productivity purposes.

It’s not always so great for living a well-balanced life. Ever heard the one about how all work and no play made Jack a dull boy? This can be me if I’m not careful—so disciplined that I forget to have fun and live real life with real people.

That’s why I decided to employ more of the “say yes” mentality to my world. Remember the Jim Carrey movie where this was his guiding principle? To say “yes” to new experiences? I have to turn that switch on sometimes. Last year, after writing a lot of books, I decided that this year would be one of the years I had to start saying yes again. So when friends call me with an invitation for an impromptu girls trip, I jump on it, even if I’m hyperventilating about how I’ll get my work done.

This year, in March alone, I’ve hosted multiple guests, taken a weekend girls’ trip, and look forward to jetting off to New Orleans for another one on Sunday. Sounds fun, right? And it has been! But there’s always that little voice in my head that fears I’m doing too much and won’t get my work done. I really struggle to quiet that voice, because it can rob me of joy if I let it make too much noise.

Because I don’t need to sky dive or bungee jump to feel like I’m fully alive, but I absolutely need to savor the social connections in my world. Friends and family bring me more happiness than any workday, no matter how much I’m loving my work in progress, or how excited I am to share a story with readers. If I don’t savor my real life, my fictional one ends up dying a slow death too, since guess what feeds the stories I write? My family. My friends. They share stories about places they’ve visited and fill my head, my heart, and my pages with more than I could ever dream up alone.

These days, that’s the club that I use to beat back my inner disciplinarian when she grows too vocal, warning me that I need to get back to work soon, interrupting my fun and my joy with a dour expression and dire predictions of my failure.

This is work, I whisper back. This feeds everything I do.

And I mean it.

**Help feed my Muse! Share with me your favorite thing to do when you need to recharge. Do you unplug from social media? Take a day trip? I’ve got a copy of your choice of book from my 2017-2018 backlist for one random commenter!

8 comments:

Pam Hamblin said...

Since I don't "work" outside the home vacations are very few. My down time is spending it with Doug. We might take off on the local bus to town for lunch, or play a game of dice called bones.We go for small walks around the park together. One time he even picked wild flowers and handed to me!The rest of the time I spend reading. I sometime's have to say No! We don't need to go to town. Lets have lunch at home.It's time we can spend together at home where we can watch tv, talk to each other with out being interrupted , snuggle on the couch if we want. We live a slow paced life and love it!

girlfromwva said...

i like to "run away" for the day! i make sure i have no appts. and that everyone knows where i am going. i go shopping; to bookstore, to antique store, to thrift stores & then grab a bite to eat. it is fun!

Eileen AW said...

I'm retired so to recharge I might runaway to the mall and window shop. Or meet some friends for lunch. Then there's always taking the pup on a walk. Or my favorite, pick up a book to read.

dstoutholcomb said...

I runaway with my friend Marsha for a day trip. We might be going on Monday if you want to join us.

denise

Mary Preston said...

I find that working on my crafts is a great way to recharge. Nothing as relaxing as knitting.

Linda May said...

I had a runaway day yesterday, I went and took the subway to downtown Chicago. I shopped at Old Navy, which is one of my favorite stores. I looked around at Macy's & had lunch there & then walked over to TJ Max and looked around & then finished up at Target and bought a couple pairs of legging. I then headed home to put my feet up, I was worn out. Thanks for your great generosity. Happy Weekend ahead.

Joanne Rock said...

Pam H, you are an inspiration for me...I've noticed other times when you talk about your world that you have a great gift for being content in the moment. I think a lot of us chase our tails to learn that kind of patience and joy! Good for you... and I love that Doug picked you wildflowers :-).

Joanne Rock said...

**Winner!! girlfromwva... I've got a book for you! All you need to do to claim it is message me privately at jrock008@gmail.com with a mailing address and I'll get this out for you asap! Thank you all for sharing your recharge moments with me this week on the blog! I appreciate you, my friends :-).