Tuesday, June 16, 2009

What Makes a Father?

Father's Day is just around the corner and as I stood in the mall yesterday, contemplating what on earth I could possibly by my husband, it occurred to me how much he's changed--as a husband and as a father-- since we first got married. Our first son was a honeymoon baby, so we were married less than a year when he put in an appearance-- and neither of us had any idea of what we were doing.

From the very beginning, my husband was an enthusiastic father-- he wanted to be involved in every aspect of our son's life and was a very exciting playmate for him once he was able to sit up and crawl and run around. But despite his interest and enthusiasm, my hubby was also an immature father. One who expected the baby to only need him when it was convenient for him (i.e. no grad school tests to study for, no job to run off to), one didn't expect a kid to cost very much and one who didn't understand just how much sacrifice comes with raising a healthy, happy child.

Now, twelve years and three children later, my husband is the best father and husband I could ask for. A great provider, an interested and involved father who is still a great playmate, he does an excellent job of balancing his own needs with those of our children. I definitely consider myself one of the lucky ones.

In my June book, From Friend to Father, my main character, Reece, also has trouble with the transformation from being a man who only needs to take care of himself, to one who must step up and be a father to-- not only his own baby-- but my heroine's twin boys from a previous marriage. Becoming a dad isn't easy for Reece-- he makes a lot of mistakes along the way. But that only makes it so much sweeter when he finally gets it right with baby Rose and the boys. And it certainly makes things interesting between him and Sarah, a natural-born nurterer who doesn't believe that Reece will ever be able to make the transformation. It was great fun proving her wrong.

So, as Father's Day approaches, what about the men in your life-- father, husband, sons, friends-- makes you grateful? And if anyone has an idea for a great Father's Day present, please let me know. I left the mall empty-handed yesterday ...


Helen said...


Here in Australia Fathers Day isn't till September and I usually but my Hubby some nice clothes for summer if that helps.

We had 4 children by the time hubby was 30 and he is the greatest father and now the greastest grandfather he has always loved spending time with our kids they have all moved out now but he so loves it when they all visit which is often and of course we have 4 beautiful grandchildren now as well and he loves playing with them and they love him

Have Fun

Tracy Wolff said...

I usually go with clothes, which is why I thought I'd try to be original this year, Helen. Sigh-- but originality takes so much effort.

Glad to know you have such a wonderful family. Hard to imagine it's winter there while it's 110 degrees here

Thanks for the suggestion-- I'll probably end up taking it.

Laney4 said...

Hi! How about tickets? He could go to a racing event ... or a round of golfing somewhere special (with friends?) ... or a guy's trip somewhere special with his friends.... What about personalized licence plates or something else for his car? A goofy T-shirt with perhaps a picture of him or his family on the front?

Gee, I have all these ideas, but do I get them for MY husband (as both dads are no longer with us)? Nah! Clothes are NEEDED, so they come first. We'll probably have friends over for supper, though, and play croquet in the backyard! As long as we're together, that's the main thing. It's a bonus when we have a great time together too!

Good luck with whatever you do!

Tracy Wolff said...

Laney4, thanks so much for all the great ideas! And have a fun and fabulous father's day.

Alison said...

It may not seem very exciting but I've found most men like a funky torch (like a maglite).

Sunnymay said...

Having 5 kids, we started a tradition of Father's Day Week instead of just one day. Being on Sunday-best behavior all week was a challenge, but my husband reaped the benefits of treatment like a king.