Monday, May 19, 2008

No Regrets

My newest release will be out next week. The heroine in SAFE WITH A STRANGER, Clare Chandler, is a woman filled with regret. She married the wrong man and then compounded the problem by having his child. Now she is on the run in order to keep her son safe from his father. She wouldn’t trade her son for the world, but what would she do when faced with the opportunity to do it all over again?

There are other big mistakes people make in life, and that idea got me to thinking about forks in the road. Opportunities taken and regretted—or missed and lost forever. I wonder which is worse. The times when what we do doesn’t work out and costs us in the end? Or the times when out of neglect or fear we miss a chance that might’ve changed our lives for the better forever?

My husband and I were talking about just this topic the other day. We’ve made our share of mistakes in life. Plenty of them. But we’ve made peace with most of those. It’s the roads we didn’t take that seem to haunt us years later. The stock we weren’t quick enough to buy before the price doubled. The job offer we refused because another one sounded better. The town we ‘could’ve’ moved to except life threw us that curve. And the even more personal choices not taken that we don’t ever talk about. The old boyfriend or girlfriend we could’ve had once but turned down. The friend we lost because we were afraid to ask what was wrong. The things we ‘should’ve’ done with our kids and didn’t because we had no clue the time was running short.

Do you have any regrets? Things you should’ve done but were too afraid or slow to take the chance? You’re not alone. I’ll bet there are plenty of you who would like to write a novel but don’t out of fear of rejection. And how about those of you who have lost contact with an old friend because you didn’t take the time to phone or write. Even I have a couple of books spinning in my head that I wished I’d written but have been afraid to try. Do you think we can correct some of those missed opportunities? Can we change our lives even a long time later? I think we can. That’s why I write romance novels where people get second chances.

So, are you willing to share some of your missed opportunities? Nothing too personal—unless you feel the need to confess. LOL You’ll be in good company here no matter what it is. I promise.

To sweeten the pot and get you dishing, I’ll draw names tomorrow morning from the comments and send two winners an autographed copy of SAFE WITH A STRANGER.

Love and Hugs,

Linda Conrad's SAFE WITH A STRANGER is a June
release, currently available online and on the
by May 27, 2008. Check out what's new with Linda,
enter her contest, and read her Behind the


Cheri2628 said...

The missed opportunities that I had are ones when I wish now that I had spent more time with someone before they died. I have learned never to take the time that you have with a loved one for granted.

Linda Conrad said...

Oh yes, cheri2628! Absolutely that's a big regret for a lot of us. I was lucky with my mom but not as much with my beloved m-i-l. She had been so good to me over the years and I was under a deadline and kept putting off going to her bedside--until it was too late. I can only hope that she knew how much I loved her.

Nathalie said...

I think that is hard to all of us, when we say good-buy to a loved one. My grand-aunt, which I adored, passed away last year. I knew she was very sick, but could not detach myself from obligations here, so I was only able to say good-buy by phone. It was horrible!

Lily said...

I once had a stupid argument with a very good friend, and then she went in anther country and we lost contact. It was horrible to spoil a great firendship for futile things, so know I try to always patch things quickly with the ones close to me.

Linda Conrad said...

Sorry to hear of your missed opportunites Nathalie and lily! We know how you feel.
Now can we think of something we might've missed that was a good thing? Like the guy we passed up and have been forever grateful that we didn't get stuck with that one?

Ellen said...

One thing I don't have to regret is taking a loved one for granted and not spending time with them because I missed other chances to take care of my parents when they were sick and I was with them when they died. BUT I do regret not making friends when I was in school. We moved so much when I was in school that I wouldn't make close friends because I knew we'd be leaving soon.

Ellen said...

oops forgot what else I was going to say ---- when I was in college I worked at the USO in the evenings (this was during the Vietnam war) and I met a soldier who wanted to get serious. I refused to date him even tho he wanted to get serious and am I glad I did. I later found out he was already married!

ilona said...

I actually am one of those rare people who have no regrets about how her life has gone.

I have missed a few opportunities, such as going to college to learn languages, but in return I ended up with five wonderful children (four of whom have so far ended up in University).

The way I see life is, you only get one crack at it and regretting things not done only gets in the way of enjoying what you have now.

Linda Conrad said...

ROFLOL, Ellen!
The story about the missed boyfriend who was married is exactly what I was talking about. One of my high school boyfriends looked me up a few years ago and he had become an airline pilot. I thought, hmmm maybe I shouldn't have turned him down all those years ago? But then I found out he'd been married four times and had spent a night in jail for supposedly dating a fifteen-year-old. Ha! So grateful I was smart enough as a teen to figure that one out in advance!

Stefanie said...

I'm only 20, so I haven't got a lot of missed opportunities.
At the moment, I don't have any real regrets and I hope it will stay that way.:D

CrystalGB said...

I think I missed out on a lot of opportunities because I allowed my fear of driving stand in the way of getting my drivers license when I was younger. After I got my license, I reget not doing it sooner.

Estella said...

I missed the opportunity to go to college, by getting married at 18 and having my first child by 19. Another child and a divorce by 22.

acdaisy95 said...

One of the missed opportunities would be to continue to learn more in school.

Linda Conrad said...

Ilona, those sentiments are terrific. I'm sure more of us wish we had nothing to regret. I think what I meant more than anything, is the idea of forks in the road. Every life has a few of those and most of us wonder what might have happened to us if we had taken the other one instead.
That's not exactly a regret- more of just a curiosity.

Yes, I hope you never regret anything too, Stephanie. But there will be forks in the road ahead. Maybe there have already been some, eh?

crystalgb, don't regret not driving earlier. Too many teens drive themselves into early graves.
Your fear may have been well placed. Use your freedom wisely. There will be other forks in the road and directions to choose.

Ah, estella and acdaisy95, I am a huge fan of school. But the great thing about missing that fork in the road is there's always another chance. I read the other day about a 95 year-old woman graduating from college. I take classes whenever I can. Partime. Work/school programs. Over the Internet. However you can get it in. Never give up!


Pat Cochran said...

I have nothing specific to share,
like everyone else I just wish I had gotten more family information from
Mother and others. My chief advice
to everyone: GO FOR IT! Don't put yourself in the position where you
will later be regretting not taking

Pat Cochran

Linda Conrad said...

Hey, Pat! You said it!
Life is too short. Trying things and taking chances (at least calculated ones) is the way to go. Even if things turn out wrong, I find that taking the chance and failing is worlds better than always wondering if you could.

Linda Conrad said...

All right, I drew two names and Ellen and Estella won! Please send me your snail mail addresses. email to:

Thanks for the interesting discussion everyone!

Ellen said...

Thanks Linda = snail mail address is on its way

Estella said...

Thanks, Linda.
Email is on the way.